I recently spent some time in an MRI machine for a scan. It’s not the most pleasant experience. For starters, if you are in this very narrow tube, it’s probably because doctors are looking for something wrong with you. For some reason, doctors need all hospitals to be unreasonably cold to do their best work. After you lay down on a hard, cold board they strap your head in a vice and instruct you not to move a muscle, as if that were still an option. Once the machine starts, you are audibly assaulted with what it must sound like to be in a metal room with a jackhammer. This, my friends, is one of the finest opportunities I’ve recently experienced to test the effectiveness of the calm conditioning I’ve been practicing over the years. I had enough time to cycle through a few practices, Curious Mindfulness, Anchored Responses, and Truth Meditation, and I’d like to share the results with you.
Curious Mindfulness
When I find myself in a downward spiral, I immediately interrupt the pattern by asking quality questions. It’s worth noting how the quality of questions we ask ourselves can quickly shift our focus from self-pity and anger to curiosity and strategy.
Low-Quality Questions:
- Why does bad stuff always happen to me?
- Why can’t I ever catch a break?
- When will this be over?
High-Quality Questions:
- What can this challenging experience teach me?
- With whom can I share everything I’m learning?
- What is the most important thing I can do or focus on right now?
It’s tempting to use self-pitying rhetorical questions to prove our powerlessness so we can check out of challenging moments. We interrupt this stream of unhelpful thinking when we engage our minds with high-quality questions that allow us to collect beneficial data that may be the key to improving our circumstances. If nothing else, it can at least improve our outlook, which is arguably more important than improving our circumstances. Choosing to be presently aware, minus the dramatic labels, prevents us from quickly categorizing experiences as good or bad before we ever understand how they fit into the bigger picture. I’ve had a lot of “bad” days that were a catalyst to improving my future. Instead of asking “How can a loving God give me this broken body?” we can ask “What am I learning about the value of life? How can this help me appreciate the days I have? Who can I share this perspective with that may not have the constant reminder of facing our inevitable mortality?” Curious mindfulness, especially on our worst days, helps us write an empowering narrative that can be shared to glorify God and encourage others.
Anchored Responses
Anchoring positive memories, states, and emotions is a great tool to store and access emotional stability and stamina. This practice helps us condition appropriate responses when circumstances are tense. I’ll explain this tool and how I use it, so you can confidently enjoy creative liberty as you develop your own anchored responses. I use three main hand motions as my anchors. One helps me enter a peaceful, relaxed state (condition/thriving health), another brings me into a loving, engaged state (connection/deep relationships), and a final one primes a confident, focused state (contribution/meaningful work). I highly recommend prioritizing an anchor to a peaceful, relaxed state first. This anchor has served me so well over the years.
Begin by sitting or standing in a comfortable position. Close your eyes as you inhale deeply and exhale slightly longer. Vividly imagine yourself in your favorite peaceful place. Notice how it engages each of your five senses. When you feel calm and relaxed, make a distinct, small motion. You may tap your little finger and thumb together twice, press your thumb into your palm, or lightly tap your leg. It does not matter which motion you choose as long as you feel comfortable doing it discreetly in a crowded room. This motion will be the anchor you associate with entering a peaceful, relaxed state. We strengthen our anchor each time we practice entering this state and make the physical connection. Eventually, this Pavlovian motion can help us access a state of calm amid chaos. This practice can be accomplished in as little as one minute, so I recommend making this a daily practice. Try it for a month. The time invested to create a calm, relaxing state on command will pay dividends when chaos threatens your space.
Anchoring a Calm, Relaxed State of Mind:
- Sit or stand comfortably.
- Close your eyes.
- Inhale deeply. Exhale slightly longer.
- Vividly imagine your peaceful place. Engage your senses.
- Anchor your state with a distinct, discreet physical motion.
Repeat often until it feels easy and natural. Begin using your anchor to calm your senses when you start feeling overwhelmed.
The Connection and Contribution anchors are more like deposits that we make in the present to build our confidence for interactions and events in the future. When you are enjoying a positive, playful, or loving moment with someone, take a mental reel of this moment. Notice how you feel, and make a distinct, discreet motion that will be your anchor to connect with others in a loving, vulnerable, and present state. I use my thumb to draw a half circle around the bottom of my ring finger when I feel lovingly present with others. I use this unique anchor as a reminder to be fully present, kind, and loving before I step into a crowded room of strangers, walk into a coffee shop to meet friends, or set the table for dinner with my family. Similarly, any time I experience a win with my work, big or small, I anchor it by squeezing my hand into a fist. This tiny celebration reminds me that it feels good to make meaningful contributions, my work matters, and the challenges will be worth it.
Truth Meditation
I saved the heavy hitter for last. After my time in the MRI Tube, I can confidently share that those first two strategies are effective but incomplete without the supernatural transforming peace of speaking God’s Truth over our hearts and circumstances. We are so blessed to carry around phones that make the Bible accessible anytime anywhere. Do the pre-millennium babies remember when teachers cajoled us into memorizing the multiplication table because we couldn’t walk around with calculators in our pockets? Well, we know that rationale didn’t age well thanks to our smartphones. I hate to admit that a small piece of me felt the same way about memorizing scripture. Why would I need to memorize text that I can access anytime anywhere? It wasn’t until I was locked in that MRI scan that I truly appreciated my Sunday school teacher imploring us to memorize Psalm 23. I promise you, after I felt the peace of mentally reciting that passage for what felt like the hundredth time, I vowed to memorize more of God’s peace-delivering, heart-transforming, storm-quieting truth when I got out of that tube. Pick a verse that brings you peace, comfort, or hope and commit it to memory. Write it on sticky notes around the house. Set an image of it as your screen background. Share it with friends. When we write God’s truth in our hearts, it can create perfect peace in any chaos.
Restorative Peace
It’s easy to think that optimization is about finding the “right” way to do something. I’m learning that optimization is a continuous practice of observing what’s working, broken, and missing to make tiny adjustments in the right direction. Our best this year will hopefully be our baseline next year because we’ll refine, optimize, and improve as we learn. Most importantly, I’m so thankful that my best is never a match for God’s best. I commit to doing my best work in the natural by practicing tiny optimizations, such as curious mindfulness, anchored responses, and truth meditation. Through these intentional practices, I see more evidence each year that chaos is no match for God’s restorative peace.
Faith Encouragement:
Isaiah 26:3 You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.
Jeremiah 29:13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
Psalms 23
1 The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters,
3 he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.
4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
6 Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
